


Gone (15x18 coda)

by LimeyJellyBean



Series: Random bits of coda [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: 15x18 coda, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-09
Updated: 2020-11-09
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:47:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27474493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LimeyJellyBean/pseuds/LimeyJellyBean
Summary: It’s painfully ironic that the only thing he feels right now is empty, almost laughing at the way the universe - Chuck, to be specific - shoves a middle finger up at him.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Series: Random bits of coda [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2010742
Comments: 2
Kudos: 46





	Gone (15x18 coda)

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, this isn't a happy one.

Dean doesn’t know how long he’s been sat on the floor, cold concrete sapping all heat and comfort from him, phone ringing out over and over again as Sam desperately tries to get in touch with him. His head hasn’t left his hands, but tears have long since dried on his face, sobs still trying to rack his body at uneven intervals. It’s painfully ironic that the only thing he feels right now is _empty_ , almost laughing at the way the universe - Chuck, to be specific - shoves a middle finger up at him.

Another sob racks him as events replay in his head, unconsciously trying to draw comfort from the handprint on his jacket, even now still tacky with blood where Castiel had shoved him away from the Empty. The memory of black tendrils engulfing the only person who loves him in a way that no-one else has him shuddering, dry eyes trying to release more tears that just aren’t there to spill over, hands moving away from his face long enough to punch the floor in frustration. Knuckles crack as he continues his assault, not caring that they end up bloody and sore, focusing on that feeling instead of the crushing weight in his chest. He cries out, anger spurring him on until he feels a knuckle give way, crying out again as he brings his hands back to his face.

“It’s not fair…” The words are barely above a whisper, barely audible to his own ears as he wraps his hands around his head. “It’s not fair!” Knees move to under his chin, desperately trying to find some comfort as he curls in on himself, exhaustion claiming him.

\------------------------------------------

Sam finds him in that position hours later, stopping dead in his tracks after flinging open the door at the sight before him. The noise doesn’t even make Dean lift his head, Sam’s stomach sinking as he cautiously crosses the room to his older brother. Jack hovers in the doorway, taking a step back as he tries to work out why the atmosphere feels so _wrong_.

“Dean?” Sam’s voice is gentle as he kneels down, hand cautiously reaching out to touch Dean’s shoulder. He pauses as he notices the bloody handprint there, slowly pulling it back as he rests it on Dean’s knee instead. Sam doesn’t anticipate the failing reaction, falling back as he moves out of the way enough to avoid a boot to the face, stomach sinking further as he takes in Dean’s expression. Any anger at not answering calls is immediately forgotten as the older Winchester blinks, a brief glimmer of hope crossing his features before disappearing as recognition of Sam’s face kicks in.

“Dean… What happened? Where’s Cas?” Sam’s voice is still gentle, the soft tone usually only reserved for when they’ve rescued people from monsters, trying his hardest not to spook Dean any more than he already is. He barely hears Dean’s response, voice quiet yet hoarse.

“... Gone.”

“What? What- Dean, what do you mean he’s gone?”

“... Dead. Empty. Gone.” Sam turned to Jack, surprised to see the Nephilim with tears in his eyes.

“Jack?” He wiped at his eyes, crossing the threshold so Sam could hear him properly.

“Cas made a deal with the Empty. To save me. When he let himself truly be happy… The Empty would come and take him away.” Sam’s eyebrows shot up, eyes wide as he turned back to Dean.

“Dean?”

“... I didn’t say it back. I- The Empty took him away and I couldn’t say it back.” Dean looked up, almost sending Sam reeling as he noticed the tears in his eyes. “And now I won’t have the chance to again.”

“What? Dean, what did he say?” A sniff was Sam’s only response, the older Winchester letting his head fall back into his hands. “Dean?”

“He-” Dean choked on a sob, not looking up at his brother as he tried to find the words. “He loved me, Sammy. And now I’m never gonna get the chance to say it back.”


End file.
